Not that I'm Ann Landers...

Dear readers this week has been little better than last in the royal news I'm afraid. It is all so distressing - worrying about Harry and Charles and wondering when the Queen will finally be heralded rather than tormented. This is her Golden Jubilee and I do wish to see her feted over all she has accomplished rather than brandished for the acts of her grown children. What is a Muse to do?

Well, let's start with me thanking all of you for your great insight into the Harry story. As most of us suspected, there was more. The News of the World's lead story this Sunday was an interview with the "reformed heroin junkie" who gave Harry the three-hour tour of Featherstone Lodge. There was also a copy of the thank you note sent by Mark Dyer, Harry's aid. The article stated Mr. Dyer "sent a letter on St James's Palace notepaper to thank the clinic for helping the prince and added: "It opened Harry's eyes." I don't think the clinic released the letter as it looked like it might have been a copy given to Paul Smith, "reformed heroin junkie" by the clinic. Was this the letter that started the brouhaha? Did the News of the World have this second front-page story planned since before the first one hit? It appears to be what happened to Sophie Wessex. She cooperated in an attempt to contain the damage and both stories were run. Now I feel sorry for Mr. Dyer as well for his act of civility has turned into a PR debacle. Well, I'm sure I'm not the only person wondering where the PCC was on this article?

Second, did anyone happen to notice that this Sunday's news echoed many of the opinions expressed by the Muse on Thursday? Did anyone notice that the quotes I used from statements and other articles were the exact ones used in the "about face" articles some of the papers ran on Sunday? My sister has long felt that St. James Palace reads this column. I've always felt that she believes it because she is my sister and believes in me. I've always thought that the things that change after the column runs were in the works before. Now I'm beginning to wonder if my sister isn't spot on with her thoughts. For this week I've had two forms of proof in that not only did Charles did announce that he would be rearranging his calendar to spend more time at Highgrove with Harry this summer but, I received an email via the site that begins, "I'm a journalist, and I've just been researching an article on What's Happening to Harry, when I came across your website." If this be the case, let me tell Charles directly what I think of the announcement regarding the rearranging of his diary.

Dear Charles:

Don't be so quick to blame your parents for everything. I'm referring to the stories that you are willing to spend more time at Highgrove this summer for your son's sake even if it risks upsetting the Queen who feels you ought to spend more time in London. Try taking the DNA out of the equation and saying, "My CEO feels it's important for me to spend a certain percentage of my time in London. How can I do this and parent my son?"

First of all you do not need to rearrange your diary. You do not need to spend the summer at Highgrove. Here's how we working parents have done it successfully with our children. Children appreciate being part of their parent's lives. Let Harry be part of yours. Make a place for him at St. James Palace. Plan some activities for him while you are at work. You must have heard stories of your dear great-grandmother, Queen Mary, and her famous excursion with your own mother and Aunt Margo to the fine museums of London. Enjoy a meal with him during the day - it doesn't have to be dinner. Ask him how his plans worked out. Encourage him to make friends with people his own age. Speak to their parents. If they have the values that you cherish, chances are their children will as well.

Take Harry with you on a few official duties. Let him see his father at work. Let him feel a renewed sense of pride in all that your Prince's Trust accomplishes. Let him attend a few planning meetings so he can gain insight into what it takes to do what you do so well. After all, he will be taking on his share of royal duties soon and your time spent grooming him will help him confidently transition into this role. The heiress', Marjorie Merriweather Post, Dad, CW Post, took her to work and to board meetings not only because he adored her but also because he wanted her to know everything about the business she would inherit. She remains one of the most respected businesswomen in history. It wasn't fate that granted her the gift of a happy childhood and lead to her success as head of CW Post at the age of 27 - it was her father.

Just think of all that you will gain as you experience the bond that develops as Harry grows in his respect of what it takes to be Prince of Wales. Ask for his thoughts. Ask what he would like to see changed in the world. Ask him what he enjoyed most about his day with you. Tell him what you enjoy most about being with him. He will appreciate that very much.

Bottom line, Charles, it doesn't matter if you live in the city or the country, in an apartment or on a farm. All that matters is that you take the time to share things with your son every day. While you were away from Highgrove this summer a call home each day would have lead you to he conclusion that all was not right. A surprise invitation to spend some time in London with you would have given Harry something to look forward to. My own father always says if you have nothing to look forward to you have nothing. Encourage Harry to explore things that interest him, as this too will ensure he always has something to look forward to.

We all know that you have unique issues in raising your sons. We all have unique issues. We owe it to our children to care enough to circumnavigate all that interferes with the pursuit of a happy, productive childhood. That's what parenting is all about. Teaching our children to be interdependent, fulfilled, happy individuals. And we don't need to tell you that there is no substitute for a happy childhood, nor any way of going back to do it over again. The best gift you have to give your children is the gift of yourself. Do give generously.